Saturday, 24 September 2011

September 24th 2011

Today has not been the most satisfying day. I woke up early to commandeer the DVD player in the TV room so we could watch The Thick Of It; that was good. We had lunch and coffee in the bar. I then left some of my friends to watch F1 while I tidied up the room a bit, then thought I'd try to do some writing. Nothing. Read for a bit, had some sleep. Still nothing.

My shoes, purse, favourite bracelet and most of my books were gifts from friends. I'm very quiet, because I've been surrounded by fascinating and clever people my whole life and I figured out early on that if I just shut up for a minute, I'll learn something. I always cover my ears with my hair before I sleep because of something that happened in a TV show I saw when I was a kid. I can handle drinking spirits a million times better than I can wine or beer, due to working at TGI Friday's when I was a student the first time round and putting many, many hours into exhaustive cocktail research. I'm terrified of guns and feel uncomfortable if they're referred to even in jest, because I grew up in a place where something horrific involving a gun happened.

In short, we are products of our environment. So what do we do if our environment feels...unproductive?

I've been lucky in that inspiration has often come to me. I haven't had to think about forcing it, because it's never that long before it strikes again. My situations and homes have usually been in lovely places with interesting people. Now I'm in a place that (although beautiful if you look in the right direction) feels slightly oppressed, rigid and bland, and I have to figure out how to change my mindset so as to be more productive. The reason I'm here is nothing to do with it - I love the work, and I'm excited beyond belief about getting out there and doing it properly. But when I want to think about something else, nothing happens. 

So this week I will be working on feeling inspired. Working out a different way to approach things will be inspiring in itself, but I hope I can regain some productivity along with it. Wish me luck.

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